‽istis reclaims friends…
(weekending May 29th 2021)
This week, ‽istis has been
pondering friendship: a reunion (too far?)[i]; possible
friendships perhaps turned sour with, maybe, something of the dish best served
cold (and over several hours on national television) about it – the one after
the resignation?, the one where the Emperors are revealed as decidedly
underdressed?[ii]
An internet-based wander shows that much
seems to have been written about friends and friendship (based on research or ‘expertise
from experience’); from the positive, virtuous circle-ness:
·
‘Having friends and close peer
experiences are both important predictors of life satisfaction, and satisfied
individuals tend to have stronger and more intimate social relationships.’[iii] from
Social relations and life satisfaction: the role of friends: Amati,
Meggiolara, Rivellini and Zaccarin (colleagues, collaborators, friends?)
…to the toxic signs that someone may not
really be your friend, which supposedly include:
·
Friends only when they want something
·
You feel bad about yourself when you’ve
spent time with them
·
Your relationship feels like it’s
built on conditionality
·
They use your secrets against you
·
They bail when you need them most[iv]
On occasions such as these, ‽istis finds
wisdom on a visit to The Hundred Acre Wood[v]:
·
‘A day without a friend is like a pot
without a single drop of honey left inside.’
·
‘After all, one can’t complain. I have
my friends.’
·
‘How lucky am I to have something that
makes saying goodbye so hard.’
The article on social relations and life
satisfaction, by Amati and colleagues, ends:
‘Like all other
types of personal relationships, friendships are indeed: ‘constructed-develop,
modified, sustained and ended – by individuals acting in contextual setting’ (Adams
and Allen 1998), which is defined by age, gender, stage of life, living arrangement,
and experiences lived.’
…perhaps whether or not that process comes at an
estimated $10m[vi]
an episode with, towards the end of the series, $1m each binding these friends
together for an average of 22-23 minutes, or is revealed by a social ‘track and
trace’ system at an estimated first year cost of £23 billion[vii]
So, 2021:
‽ the one
with revenge served cold?
‽ the one
with the reunion?
‽ the one with
a return to ‘normality’?
‽ the one with
a new normal?
‽ the one
where many have lost friends?
‽ the one
where many continue to be unable to influence their situation?
‽ the one
where friendships still have the capacity to enhance a sense of life satisfaction
potentially bringing less stress, intimacy, companionship, social trust and help?[viii]
‽ the one
that perhaps, possibly, maybe provides some more clues as to how things could be
different?
©
Pistis
NB: further reflections and comments linked to
this week’s theme and past blog
entries to be found on Twitter: replies, retweets (which don’t necessarily
indicate approval, sometimes the very opposite!) and ‘likes’:
@Pistis_wonders
[ii] https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2021/may/26/dominic-cummings-evidence-to-mps-on-covid-crisis-fact-checked
And apparently, with perhaps, dreadful irony, a senior official once told DC: ‘You’re
a mutant virus and I’m the immune system.’ – cited in a blog by Spartacus (https://spartacus-educational.com/spartacus-blogURL129.htm)
and apparently originally from Some Reflections on Westminster and Whitehall
Dysfunction by Dominic Cummings
[iii] Social
relations and life satisfaction: the role of friends https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5937874/
[vii] https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/coronavirus-test-trace-dido-harding-report-b1814714.html
[viii]
Social relations and life satisfaction: the role of friends https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5937874/
