‽istis wonders
and reclaims dying… (weekending July 24th 2021)
This week, sitting with someone in something
of a liminal space, some may call it the Departure Lounge, somewhere between
then and now and the not yet, ‽istis wonders about ‘endings’; living and
dying; control, choice, living wills, willing not to live; the apparent inevitability of death when ‘life’
is defined perhaps along the lines of: a sexually transmitted condition that
always proves fatal.[i]
And at a pause in the watching and
waiting, the small rise and fall with each breath; after the quiet singing of ‘Crossing
the Bar’ (with thanks to Tennyson and Rani Arbo[ii]),
the conclusions are personal, not to be imposed, promoted or expected of or for
others – but (from the person behind the nom de plume, behind the character ‘‽istis’) here then is the state of the art; the ideas and phrases that currently and continue to reside:
‽ the personal
importance of striving to be able to attain the epitaph: ‘who closed a
well-spent life’ and to have done a reasonable job of answering well the
question: ‘Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious
life?’[iii]
‽ if it is
never a question of whether, but always of when and where and how – then as much
choice as possible please would be a consummation devoutly to be wished[iv]
‽ that
loss of mental capacity, memory and sense of self seems a potential personal watershed
‽ that
preparation and putting affairs in order seems ideal (if only to minimize
the complexities and decisions for those who may remain)
‽ that minimising
pain and psychological distress, being ‘at ease’ - is definitely preferable
‽ with
those who are loved and have loved
And so, ‽istis – personally
- would like:
·
the foresight (and luxury given the common 'not knowing the day or the hour') and foretime to get things organised, to say
goodbyes and thankyous; to say I love yous, and sorrys; to pass on any
possible words of wisdom and every best wish imaginable - and to say thankyous
and I love yous again…
·
the means to ‘call it a day’ (and a
supportive legislative framework with sufficient safeguards to protect against
misuse, abuse, coercion direct or indirect[v]) personally before
mental capacity is lost and preferably when physical capacity means that the involvement
of others is avoided[vi];
at a place and time of my choosing
And if we lived in a world where something like this
perhaps, possibly, maybe could indeed be – then what else might be different?, how
might we not only choose and be able to die, but choose and be able to live?[vii]
R.I.P. and R.I.G.
And may the more,
the better and the expected reunion, when the bar is crost[viii],
indeed be waiting; we love you; thank you…
(NB: this is very much a personal position and the complexity of the moral, ethical, social, political, personal and other issues; the potential hazards and dangers that could be raised and realised for many - are certainly not underestimated. For debate...?)
©
Pistis
NB: further reflections and comments linked to
this week’s theme and past blog
entries to be found on Twitter: replies, retweets (which don’t necessarily
indicate approval, sometimes the very opposite!) and ‘likes’:
@Pistis_wonders
[i]
After RD Laing, Neil Gaiman and others?
[ii]
Many fine recordings available, it seems: Rani Arbo, of course (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XN_6V3UR-xw)
, but also The Spooky Men’s Chorale in Ely Cathedral’s Lady Chapel, a personal
favourite (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SFeYhScbZto)
[iv]
After Hamlet, Act III, scene I. William Shakespeare.
[v]
Critical and oh so difficult – but where there is a will, might there be a way?
[vi]
There seems to be a debate and this link to Humanists UK perhaps provides a
springboard? https://humanism.org.uk/assisted-dying/
[vii] …recognising
that for so many the experiences of life and death can be so difficult; so out
of control; so oppressed and coerced; so taken and diminished by others, by
social and political conditions, etc…
